OOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHH DOUG HOUSER……. GUTTURAL SCREAM… o hhahahaa hhahahha AHAAAAAAAAAHHBBBB DOUG HOUSER.. my one trrue love… … AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…AAAAAA…GGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIT! fuck… hes so silly i a aahahha a a a a n k bbbb DOUG HOUSER… DOUG DOUG Jasd i cant TAKE IT. i cant take it. i cat i cant i WANNA TEAR MY HEART OUT OUGHHH DOUG.. doug doi uife esv irg ih tihri iigigsrgngs aa aaaa
ive loved this guy since like… monkey business came out sooo many ye aarsss ago I DIDNT EVEN KNOW . it WAS CALLED THAT FOR YEARS I WAS JUST LIKE “YEAH. THE PACMAN WITH THE MONKEYS.” I LOVE YOU DOUG HOUSER. for years for yeaARS AND YOU ARE A PIECE OF SHIT DOUG KYS. i will…. he should DIe heS ALREADY DEAD NVM. die again and again for being such a piece of shit man. fuck you BITCH I LOVE YOU. KILL YOURSELF ILY
anywayYYYY this is my wife okay? my wife no he is not fictional hes real in my mind…. i dont care I DONT CARE. hes my wife i come home from work and hes cooking me meatloaf. i kiss him on the cheek and he asks how was work? and i tell him it was okay. and he sits beside me and we eat and chat and have a lovely dinner.
he may be a piece of shit but hes MY piece of shit so its fine. keep being an asshole bitch but also ill THROW HIM AT A WALL cuz hes so cute… silly.. .. .. .
i am so passisonate every time i look at his face my stomah hurts and my mouth hurts because im smiling so much and my legs hurt bc im so excited and its so painful i love him and i cant. keep it inside me i want to explode and tear my organs out. thats how excited i am to see his face (no im not exageratting my body hurts like hell from writing this hehehehe)
if i was as UGLY and PATHETIC as him id also commit sins and die to be honest like why is he so UGLY? (affectionately) pathetic sopping wet cat aaahhh AND hes american thats also a sin. gringo. what do you also love GUNS? and STEAK DINNERS????
and of course he dressed as THE JOKER for halloween fucking cringe ass bitch. fucks wrong with you are you gonna tell me ur an alpha male next? u gonna tell me how to abuse my wife on ur alpha male podcast? fuck you bitch. you are my wife GO MAKE ME A SANDWICH!!!
anyway… hold me dougie houser.. .… hold me like ur mistress made out of marble. PLEASSEEEEEEE PLEASE I CAN PURR AND MEOW FOR YOU LIKE THIS MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW EMWOE MEWOE WMEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOWWWW EMOWW
PLEAAAASEEEEE JUST ONE CHANCE. PLEASE PLEASE PLEEAS.. please… i cna roll around and beg and plead and whimper
WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE THAT U DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE WORLD….. ugly hes so ugl…………. ughhh hh hhahaha ahhahAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA … AAAAAAAAGH … HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHY … TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…AAAAAA … AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA … AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
one of these days dougie… they will make the plush and i will buy it. i will buy it because youre so marketable. and if they dont relaunch tlike whatever i guess ill make my own but it wont be the same and if they do relaunch one day and i swear to god if i dont get you… .life is not worth living because you are the main thing keeping me going doug houser. (WOULDNT BE THE FIRST KID YOUVE KILLED)
